88 Keys

Piano. One of those things that most ABCs will encounter during the childhood, right next to Chinese school and Kumon. Being a piano student for over eight years, I'd like to share my experience with those black and white keys.

According to my parents, I was enrolled in piano lessons because of my interest. I studied at the Cleveland Institute of Music in the pedagogy department when I was six years old. During the first year, I studied under the head of the pedagogy department, Mrs. Olga, a very strict and outspoken teacher. Eventually, I was transferred to one of the dean's students, Ms. Yudha.

For most of my years living in Ohio, piano lessons meant a tiring half-hour drive, anxiety and frustration. Mrs. Olga would constantly scold me for my stubbornness, the reason why she handed me down to Ms. Yudha for future instruction. Ms. Yudha would often point to a trash can and say, "That's where your mom's money is going." Lots of backward glances to my mom during these scoldings would be returned with as harsh a look. Frequent piano recitals only served to worsen my experience. I dealt with a lot of stage fright, from the moment I walked into the building.

There were a few situations that only served to augment my disliking of piano lessons. Because Mrs. Olga was a pedagogy teacher, she had her college students observing how she taught me. To me, they were just a group of people whose presence only served to intensify my anxiety. Once, when I was learning that the numbers next to the notes meant the fingerings for the key, I asked a question along the lines of "So why aren't there any 6s?" (the numbers 1-5 meant the five fingers for the hand). The whole group of college students burst out in laughter, like a pack of hyenas satisfied with its kill.

Ms. Yudha and Mrs. Olga seemed to be devoid of any human compassion. I can't remember a single compliment or word of encouragement from them. Once or twice, I felt so bad about my playing that I started crying a little. How did they react? Mrs. Olga most likely used this as a model of strictness for her college students to follow. Ms. Yudha encouraged me to cry more.

What force enabled me to continue going into that building week after week? This question still remains unanswered to this very day. Did my parents' strictness at home keep me on track with my studies? Were piano lessons and practice just so routine that I became numb to my negative feelings about it? Was my interest as a toddler enough to allow me to sustain the constant anxiety and practice necessary to study piano? Was it the anticipation of a future accomplishment, like when one works on a jigsaw puzzle, my motivation? Maybe it was even the sticker I got after completing a piece that made all the work worthwhile.

Ms. Yudha was eventually replaced by one of Ms. Olga's prior students, Mr. Lo. If I had to partition my overall piano experience, the line would be drawn at the time that I started studying at Mr. Lo. I felt that he had a tangible interest in teaching music, unlike the first two. Ms. Yudha seemed to be more concerned in the technical details rather than music as a whole. Mrs. Olga was an elitist, only offering instruction to those who were able keep up with her high standards.

Moving to New Hampshire was a hiccup in my piano instruction. Unable to find a traditional teacher, my parents signed me up with a teacher in a hole-in-the-wall type of piano instruction. I was introduced to lots of new things during my short time studying with him, such as jazz, contemporary music and music theory. When I moved, I also got an electric piano. All these factors expanded my horizons on music.

When I first studied under Philip Feng, I knew he would be completely different than my previous teachers. He taught in his apartment, giving a sense of informality to the lessons. Another thing I noticed was the length of time he spent devoted to his lessons. Ms. Yudha seemed to precisely partition an equal amount of time for all my pieces, as if she just wanted to get a cursory taste of what I'd done in the past week. She'd frequently interrupt my playing with criticism. Mr. Lo would spend most of the time on one, sometimes missing the others because of the time limit. For Philip, it would be natural to go past the 45 minutes allocated for the lesson. Usually, like Mr. Lo, he would spend a significant amount of the time on just one piece.

Philip was much less strict than Ms. Yudha and Mrs. Olga. This was much appreciated as it made me more feel more comfortable playing. In Cleveland, I don't remember feeling like I was getting into the music because I was more concerned about playing the notes correctly rather than feeling the music (This might also have been because the music was much simpler then). When I studied under Philip, he downplayed the effect of wrong notes on overall performance. He spent most of his lesson focusing on phrasing and expression. When he talked about technique, it was presented as another way to introduce a different color and tone to the music.

It was working with Philip where I really began to enjoy playing piano. I was made aware of the vast amount of musical nuances behind the notes. With the right mindset, this understanding led to a greater appreciate of piano, just as the understanding the motifs and themes behind a piece of literature leads to a greater appreciation of it. Although I was still reluctant to put lots of hours into practicing, I was considerably more interested and focused when I did practice.

Although I didn't know it at the time, piano competitions gave me motivation to practice more, just as matches and tournaments give athletes motivation to train harder. My performance in annual auditions and competitions gave me the opportunity to see how I had progressed in the past year. Additionally, it made the hours spent preparing for the competitions, though not that many, worthwhile. Getting an honorary mention in the Granite State Piano Competition in 2006 was one of the most satisfying moments of my life. Not receiving anything save a record of participation the following year was difficult, but it made me realize that piano was an all or nothing activity. It entails long hours of practicing, even if it is just spent on a small section of music. Because of this, it also requires a lot of interest and motivation, something I don't think I have enough of. These opportunities helped me to view piano as something past practicing in the living room and playing in long studio recitals.

Piano played an essential role in my transition to other instruments. Concepts of voicing, phrasing, and dynamics helped me to quickly pick-up and develop my ability to play on drums, bass and guitar. I was able to understand how other drummers transition between parts of a song, because I was used comfortable with phrasing in classical music. With an attentive ear and lots of experimentation, I began to develop my own fills. In bass and guitar, simple concepts in music theory like arpeggios helped enhance my playing.

When I was still in middle school, my dad offered a sort of business deal with me. If I would play half an hour of piano a month at an elderly home in Nashua, he would add $5 dollars to my allowance. I decided to try it out, but I rejected the monetary offer. Playing piano as a form of community service returned me in a way that could not be measured through money. Well maybe it could, because this offer would expand a hundred-fold.

Playing piano at Hunt Community was a very satisfying activity. My audience, though only 5-20 people, seemed to enjoy the performance, giving me lots of compliments afterward. Slowly, connections formed with my audience. I met Susan and Victor Tallarico, parents of Steven Tyler, lead singer of Aerosmith. He would constantly give me feedback on my performance, occasionally ranting about my choice of music. However, his presence made it more interesting to play, as I had professional eyes and ears watching and listening to my performance. He asked me a lot about my teacher. Before I left for the summer, he gave me music suggestions and his own sheet music.

When I asked Katie to help me play piano with me and mentioned that we were both instructed by the same teacher, Mr. Tallarico began to take more interest in Philip. When they finally were able to talk, he gave Philip around $500 worth of music.

Although I'm not in piano lessons anymore, I still play once in a while, sometimes longer than the time I normally spent practicing. When I do, I find myself truly engaged in the music, playing for the sake of listening and enjoying the music, instead of technical perfection. To me, It represents one of the best forms of self-expression, the basis of any further musical learning, and an opportunity to serve the community. It is one of those things that will be a vital part of who I am.